Grief and Depression: Understanding the Overlap

Grief and depression are often misunderstood, especially when they appear together. If you’re grieving a loss and noticing persistent low mood, lack of motivation, or emptiness, you may wonder: is this just grief, or something more? You’re not alone in asking this question. Understanding how grief and depression connect can help you recognise when you may need extra support, as well as provide comfort in knowing your experience is valid.

Why Grief and Depression Often Overlap

When we lose someone important, it’s normal to experience deep sadness, longing, or numbness. Over time, many find these feelings soften. For others, however, grief can intensify into depression, a condition that not only affects your mood but also your thoughts, body, and daily functioning.

Shared Signs and Distinct Differences

Both grief and depression can involve:

• Deep sadness and tearfulness

• Sleep disturbance (either too much or too little)

• Changes in appetite

• Withdrawal from friends or activities

• Trouble concentrating

However, while grief comes in waves and is often linked to reminders of the loved one, depression tends to be more constant, with a sense of hopelessness or emptiness that rarely lifts. In grief, positive feelings and fond memories can still bring comfort. In depression, pleasure and hope are often absent.

How Common is Depression During Bereavement?

Studies show that major depressive episodes are more common following the loss of a loved one. Research suggests a significant portion of widowed individuals experience major depression in the first month after loss, with some still affected a year later, higher than in the general population.

A history of depression makes it more likely to recur after bereavement. People with lingering depressive symptoms, even without a formal diagnosis, are at higher risk for long-term difficulties including impaired physical health and social isolation.

Why Does Bereavement Sometimes Lead to Depression?

Loss is a major life stressor that can overwhelm our coping resources. When support is lacking, or when the loss is particularly traumatic or unexpected, the risk of depression increases. Depression after loss is not a personal failing, it's a natural response to extraordinary stress.

Emerging research also highlights a biological link: bereavement is linked with measurable changes in immune function and increased inflammation, which in turn can worsen mood and accelerate depression symptoms for some individuals.

When Grief Becomes Complicated

For some, grief evolves into “complicated grief” (sometimes called prolonged grief disorder), where feelings of loss remain intense and disabling well beyond a year. Complicated grief frequently overlaps with depression, and both conditions can make daily tasks and relationships feel impossible.

Symptoms to look out for include:

• Intense, persistent longing or preoccupation with the deceased

• Feelings of worthlessness or guilt unrelated to the loss

• Ongoing difficulty functioning at home, work, or in relationships

• Thoughts of suicide

The Impact on Physical Health

The effects of grief and depression are not just emotional. They can also increase risk for:

• Impaired immune function

• Poor sleep and fatigue

• Increased heart problems or other health issues

This is why it’s so important to care for your whole self, body and mind, during bereavement.

Strategies for Coping and Support

You can’t simply “snap out of” grief or depression, but there are practical steps you can take that may help, especially if your daily functioning is affected:

• Talk to someone you trust—whether it’s friends, family, a support group, or a qualified therapist. Sharing reduces isolation and can provide perspective.

• Join a bereavement support group—connecting with others can break cycles of loneliness, and offer comfort from those who truly understand.

• Seek professional counselling if your mood doesn’t improve, you’re struggling to cope, or you feel hopeless or suicidal. Therapy can help you work through both grief and depression, and develop personalised coping strategies.

• Take care of your physical health. Keep basic routines where possible. Eat regular meals, aim for gentle exercise, and prioritise sleep—these can make a significant difference.

• Plan for tough days. Anniversaries, birthdays, and holidays can be especially hard. Making a self-care plan or marking the day in a way that feels meaningful may help.

When to Reach Out for Help

Bereaved individuals are at higher risk for developing depression, especially if grief persists or becomes overwhelming. If you notice unrelenting sadness, loss of interest, persistent insomnia or appetite loss, difficulty functioning, or suicidal thoughts, professional help is essential. You can speak with your GP, or other registered mental health professional. Support is also available through online therapy and specialist bereavement organisations.

You Don’t Have to Do This Alone

Grief and depression are deeply connected, but with support, healing is possible. Whether you seek help from loved ones, your community, or a mental health professional, remembering you are not alone can help ease the weight. Taking the first step toward support is courageous, and help is available whenever you need it.

About the Author: 

Karen Lafferty is a BACP Accredited counsellor, supervisor and mental health trainer. Karen has specialised in supporting client and grief practitioners since 2016, and has an online private practice working with people from across the UK. For more information you can access her website at www.continuumcounselling.com or connect with her on Instagram and Facebook @continuumcounselling.

She is also the host of Grief Unedited, a podcast where guests talk honestly and openly about their experience of grief. Available on all major platforms.

Bibliography

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• van Eersel, J.H. et al. (2024). Prolonged Grief Symptoms Predict Social and Emotional Loneliness.

• Mayo Clinic. (2022). Complicated grief - Diagnosis and treatment.