Menopause and Unspoken Grief: A Conversation on Identity and Change
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I recently was fortunate to be able to welcome a Peri-menopause coach onto my podcast, Grief Unedited, as a guest and the conversation was a real eye opener. As a woman myself, I've grown up around many females all of whom have been navigating this journey of menopause, and yet I can count on one hand the number of conversations I've been privy to about what to expect and how to manage this chapter of my life.
Menopause is often viewed as a taboo topic, shrouded in misconceptions and whispered conversations. However, it represents a significant life transition that can bring with it feelings of grief and loss, particularly concerning one's sense of self and identity. In a recent podcast episode myself, and Emma McElhenney, a perimenopause health coach, explored the unspoken aspects of menopause and its impact on women's lives.
The Grief of Menopause
Menopause is not just a biological change; it's a journey that can involve grieving for one's youth and the loss of a familiar identity. Women often talk of feeling like they're losing their mind, or feel a sense of societal pressure to remain silent about these feelings, fearing they might be perceived as vain or seen to be 'not coping'. However, acknowledging these emotions is crucial for navigating this transition, and accessing support can be a huge help in this time of change.
Reclaiming Identity
Emma emphasises that menopause is a natural part of aging, not an illness. It offers an opportunity for women to reassess their lives, careers, and relationships. This period can be transformative, allowing women to make conscious decisions about their future and redefine their sense of self. When perimenopause is experienced in a more positive light, the whole experience can be different. Rather being a time of loss and enforced change, it can be an opportunity to pause and reflect and make decisions about the shape of this next chapter of life.
Confidence and Menopause
The link between menopause and confidence is profound. Hormonal changes can affect self-esteem, but this transition also presents a chance to rebuild and strengthen confidence. By acknowledging the emotional aspects of menopause and seeking support, women can emerge more empowered and fulfilled. Accessing coaching or therapy can be a tool to help navigate this period of transition, but equally many women have good support around them in the shape of friends and family who can also offer their advice and guidance. The main thing is to not feel that you have to do it all alone.
Advice
Emma shared several key takeaways during her conversation about menopause and grief:
Menopause as a Natural Process: Emma emphasises that menopause is not an illness but a natural part of aging. She encourages women to view it as an opportunity for transformation rather than something to be feared or hidden.
Reclaiming Identity: Emma suggests that menopause can be a time for women to reassess their lives, careers, and relationships. It offers a chance to redefine one's sense of self and make conscious decisions about the future.
Empowerment through Choice: Emma stresses that women have the power to make choices about how they navigate menopause. Instead of "putting up and shutting up," women can take actions to make this period more enjoyable and freeing.
Addressing Grief and Loss: Emma acknowledges the grief associated with menopause, particularly the loss of youth and familiar identity. She encourages women to acknowledge these feelings without fear of being seen as vain, as it's about recognising change rather than vanity.
Exploring New Opportunities: Emma highlights that menopause is not a "death knell" but a transition that offers opportunities for personal growth. Women can explore new careers, relationships, or life paths that better align with their current needs and desires.
Conclusion
Menopause is more than a biological milestone; it's a catalyst for personal growth and transformation. By addressing the unspoken grief and embracing the changes that come with this stage, women can find new paths to confidence and self-discovery.
Listen to the episode:
Youtube: https://youtu.be/qxTeXrJTMts
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3PfBh8BtpdJAnTjZjcQUtJ?si=2cae4581befb4bc9
To link to Emma's services : https://www.teamemw.com
You can connect with me here: https://www.continuumcounselling.com
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